Growing up in a nonreligious home where we celebrated a very Americanized, nondenominational Christmas and Easter, it’s hard understand that there is a whole religion that not only doesn’t celebrate these prevalent holidays, but feels connected to a land—a very small, important land—across the world. This connection is not only fostered through the use of Hebrew as a major portion of the religious text, but is reinforced through prayers…”next year in Jerusalem”…. that are used daily, weekly, and yearly.
And as a Jew by Choice (JBC), I had no connection, physically or emotionally, to Israel. When it came time for my husband and me to plan our honeymoon, I was surprised when he insisted on going to Israel. “Are you sure?” I said snobbishly, “Can’t we go somewhere I really want to go?” He was positive. We went. And I am really glad I did, because it’s a place that changes you forever.
Walking around Tel Aviv or Jerusalem for the first time is a revelation for Jews. Look there’s a shop that sells only Judaica…and another…and another! Hey, do you want to buy a tallis or a havdallah set? No problem. What a concept—you have more than three choices!
In the United States, the stereotype of Jews is that we are doctors, lawyers, accountants…not a bad stereotype certainly, but in Israel, suddenly, Jews are bus drivers, garbage collectors, criminals, merchants, AND doctors AND lawyers AND accountants. What a warm feeling to know such a place exists.
My husband commented to me that the importance of Israel for him wasn’t that he had family there or a long history, but that it just was there. It was our place. It’s where being Jewish is a way of life, and there’s no reason to have to explain any religious practice (“Why don’t you wear a yarmulke, and where’s your beard?” a young Christian skier recently asked him as they traveled up the ski lift).
I have taken classes at the synagogue from my Rabbi or through the Florence Melton Mini School, and this topic comes up a lot. We go around the table and talk about whether or not we’d been to Israel. Most of my classmates have been at least once, either through Birthright or with family. My Rabbi asked me an important question…”Did I feel Jewish when I went?” I told him that I didn’t feel Jewish until I went to Israel.
Last year, I had the opportunity to go again, this time by myself on a young leader’s mission where I toured places that receive money that I help fundraise. What an eye-opening experience. As one woman stated during the trip, “For the first time, I realize that it’s time to have an adult relationship with Israel.” What does that mean? It means that as adults…as Jews…we belong to Israel and we have a responsibility to her.
Yes, it’s beautiful there. Yes, there’s a lot of fun things to do as a tourist. And yes, walking around and looking at all the faces you see and knowing that they are most likely Jewish is a wonderfully comforting feeling. But, it wasn’t until I went, until I educated myself at the good work many agencies do in helping people who live there, until I read books about Israel, and until I realized that Israel is a land that is ours, where we can be Jewish openly, without worrying whether or not someone will understand why you can’t go to a soccer game on Yom Kippur, that I got it. I really got why having a relationship—emotionally and physically---is so important to Jews.
JBCs are at a real disadvantage when it comes to this issue. We don’t have the familial ties that born Jews have. But I created my own ties and realized that although my DNA would show that I am from Ireland, Scotland, Germany, Bulgaria, and Poland, I know that I feel truly, bone-deeply Israeli. And that is a celebration to me.
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